What to do and not to do when your friend has experienced miscarriage or stillbirth...
This was an excellent post to help your friends or family heal!
Friday, January 27, 2012
Monday, January 23, 2012
Postpartum depression guide
There are all different sorts and levels of depression and PPD. Some baby blues is normal after a baby is born. Your hormones dramatically fluctuate. But if after your baby is born, you are about 6 weeks PP and you find that you are feeling horrible. Everything is irritating you; life seems to heavy to bear, you find yourself thinking things you never thought you would.
Here are some symptoms you should be watchful for....
• Feeling sad or down often
• Frequent crying or tearfulness
• Feeling restless, irritable or anxious
• Loss of interest or pleasure in life
• Loss of appetite
• Less energy and motivation to do things
• Difficulty sleeping, including trouble falling asleep, trouble staying asleep or sleeping more than usual
• Feeling worthless, hopeless or guilty
• Unexplained weight loss or gain
• Feeling like life isn't worth living
• Showing little interest in your baby
You know that some of those things are normal, if you are not sleeping, but if it continues for long periods of time and you have no happy days, you may have an issue that you need to address.
If you ever consider hurting yourself or others, it is time to get help now.
But what does getting help mean?
It can depend on the level of depression you are suffering from.
You may need to force yourself to get out of the house and get some support from other mothers. Counseling (talk therapy…talking to someone about some of the stress you are under, maybe your birth did not go the way you planned it, your husband lost his job, your husband is gone, your baby does not nurse well…the list goes on), and sometimes medication.
Many people do not seek help because they are afraid of medication or assume that it is the only way they can get help.
Some things you can try if you want to avoid medication to start with:
1. Find someone to talk to- this might be a friend, but most often, a professional who knows how to deal with crisis.
2. Get in touch with someone who can help you figure out some things that relieve some of the burden on you.
3. Establish a strong social network. This is hard for many people! You had a new baby; you don’t feel like yourself. A postpartum body is hard to adjust to, and none of your clothes fit. You are struggling with breastfeeding in public. I think what many people don’t realize, is that there are many, many moms who struggle with the same things. When we get out there, we will come away realizing that our feelings are normal and it is okay to struggle. Your friends, if you are honest with them, can tell you if you need to talk to someone else.
4. Find time to do something everyday for yourself, even if it is just 15 minutes. This can be hard when you have little ones. It might mean establishing a quiet time, where they take a nap, watch a movie, read books, spend time in the crib where you know they are safe, while you take a bath.
5. Journal- this can be a great way to process some of your feelings you are having. If there was something about motherhood, birth or the whole transition that has been hard to comprehend, write those down and get it out on paper. The relief can be great!
6. Talk to your care provider. If you used a doctor or midwife during your pregnancy, give them a call and set up a time to go over how you are feeling. It might be time for some blood tests, physical to make sure there is not another reason you are feeling so tired.
7. Realize that you are not odd for feeling this way. It happens to most women! You are not expected to be perfect or super mom. Remember that if you do not care for yourself, you will not be there to take care of your children. It is not selfish to take care of yourself, but a requirement for good mothering.
There can be some small things that can help you feel better. Some need to be done in combination, but go down the list, or up the ladder, so to speak.
1. Good diet- Many times when we are tired and exhausted we may not be eating the foods we need to for proper nutrition. Focus on stocking your house with simple; easy to grab foods, that is healthy for you. For example, apples, oranges, string cheese, Greek yogurt, cucumbers, hummus, canned beans, grated cheese, whole grain tortilla, bags of salad. These foods can be easy to grab a snack or make up a meal and can help you feel better.
2. Exercise- this does not have to be anything strenuous. It can be as simple as putting your baby in the stroller and walking around the block or going to the end of your road to get the mail. It can be putting the baby in the cart and walking around the store at a good pace for 20 minutes. If you have access to a computer, there are many fun, short exercises on YouTube and other places online.
3. Fresh air: Just step outside and breathe in deeply for 5 minutes.
4. Find a hobby that you can do with having a baby. It can be as simple as nurturing a plant in your house, or as complex as detailed scrapbooking. Find something that will work with your likes and is reasonable with having a baby.
5. Vitamins and supplements: Fish oil, flax seed oil, Vitamin B formulas are some of the vitamins and minerals that can help your body to work properly. Ask your care provider for a list of vitamins that they recommend you take daily.
6. Medication- there are some anti-depressants that breastfeeding and pregnant mothers take. There are some risks involved, but the risk of a depressed mother to her baby is also great and only you and your care provider can evaluate the safety of both. Do some research on the safest ones. Here is a link to some of the studies and info from Thomas Hale’s book on pregnancy and breastfeeding with anti-depressants. http://www.kellymom.com/health/meds/antidepressants-hale10-02.html
This can be a helpful book to check out as well. I don't recommend everything in it, but it has some helpful tips.
The postpartum survival guide: Everything you need to know about Postpartum Depression by Paul Meier
You can read my full review here: http://laborpainzsupport.blogspot.com/2011/05/postpartum-depression.html
Here are some symptoms you should be watchful for....
• Feeling sad or down often
• Frequent crying or tearfulness
• Feeling restless, irritable or anxious
• Loss of interest or pleasure in life
• Loss of appetite
• Less energy and motivation to do things
• Difficulty sleeping, including trouble falling asleep, trouble staying asleep or sleeping more than usual
• Feeling worthless, hopeless or guilty
• Unexplained weight loss or gain
• Feeling like life isn't worth living
• Showing little interest in your baby
You know that some of those things are normal, if you are not sleeping, but if it continues for long periods of time and you have no happy days, you may have an issue that you need to address.
If you ever consider hurting yourself or others, it is time to get help now.
But what does getting help mean?
It can depend on the level of depression you are suffering from.
You may need to force yourself to get out of the house and get some support from other mothers. Counseling (talk therapy…talking to someone about some of the stress you are under, maybe your birth did not go the way you planned it, your husband lost his job, your husband is gone, your baby does not nurse well…the list goes on), and sometimes medication.
Many people do not seek help because they are afraid of medication or assume that it is the only way they can get help.
Some things you can try if you want to avoid medication to start with:
1. Find someone to talk to- this might be a friend, but most often, a professional who knows how to deal with crisis.
2. Get in touch with someone who can help you figure out some things that relieve some of the burden on you.
3. Establish a strong social network. This is hard for many people! You had a new baby; you don’t feel like yourself. A postpartum body is hard to adjust to, and none of your clothes fit. You are struggling with breastfeeding in public. I think what many people don’t realize, is that there are many, many moms who struggle with the same things. When we get out there, we will come away realizing that our feelings are normal and it is okay to struggle. Your friends, if you are honest with them, can tell you if you need to talk to someone else.
4. Find time to do something everyday for yourself, even if it is just 15 minutes. This can be hard when you have little ones. It might mean establishing a quiet time, where they take a nap, watch a movie, read books, spend time in the crib where you know they are safe, while you take a bath.
5. Journal- this can be a great way to process some of your feelings you are having. If there was something about motherhood, birth or the whole transition that has been hard to comprehend, write those down and get it out on paper. The relief can be great!
6. Talk to your care provider. If you used a doctor or midwife during your pregnancy, give them a call and set up a time to go over how you are feeling. It might be time for some blood tests, physical to make sure there is not another reason you are feeling so tired.
7. Realize that you are not odd for feeling this way. It happens to most women! You are not expected to be perfect or super mom. Remember that if you do not care for yourself, you will not be there to take care of your children. It is not selfish to take care of yourself, but a requirement for good mothering.
There can be some small things that can help you feel better. Some need to be done in combination, but go down the list, or up the ladder, so to speak.
1. Good diet- Many times when we are tired and exhausted we may not be eating the foods we need to for proper nutrition. Focus on stocking your house with simple; easy to grab foods, that is healthy for you. For example, apples, oranges, string cheese, Greek yogurt, cucumbers, hummus, canned beans, grated cheese, whole grain tortilla, bags of salad. These foods can be easy to grab a snack or make up a meal and can help you feel better.
2. Exercise- this does not have to be anything strenuous. It can be as simple as putting your baby in the stroller and walking around the block or going to the end of your road to get the mail. It can be putting the baby in the cart and walking around the store at a good pace for 20 minutes. If you have access to a computer, there are many fun, short exercises on YouTube and other places online.
3. Fresh air: Just step outside and breathe in deeply for 5 minutes.
4. Find a hobby that you can do with having a baby. It can be as simple as nurturing a plant in your house, or as complex as detailed scrapbooking. Find something that will work with your likes and is reasonable with having a baby.
5. Vitamins and supplements: Fish oil, flax seed oil, Vitamin B formulas are some of the vitamins and minerals that can help your body to work properly. Ask your care provider for a list of vitamins that they recommend you take daily.
6. Medication- there are some anti-depressants that breastfeeding and pregnant mothers take. There are some risks involved, but the risk of a depressed mother to her baby is also great and only you and your care provider can evaluate the safety of both. Do some research on the safest ones. Here is a link to some of the studies and info from Thomas Hale’s book on pregnancy and breastfeeding with anti-depressants. http://www.kellymom.com/health/meds/antidepressants-hale10-02.html
This can be a helpful book to check out as well. I don't recommend everything in it, but it has some helpful tips.
The postpartum survival guide: Everything you need to know about Postpartum Depression by Paul Meier
You can read my full review here: http://laborpainzsupport.blogspot.com/2011/05/postpartum-depression.html
Monday, January 16, 2012
Two interesting articles on recent studies
This one's title is Study: Homebirth is as safe as hospital birth
The study was done in Canada and is very interesting to read about!
This one was a small study done on whether breastfeeding moms get more or less sleep than non-breastfeeding moms. It was interesting as well.
http://motherloveblog.com/2012/01/14/do-breastfeeding-moms-get-more-or-less-sleep/
I would love to hear your thoughts on the topic.
The study was done in Canada and is very interesting to read about!
This one was a small study done on whether breastfeeding moms get more or less sleep than non-breastfeeding moms. It was interesting as well.
http://motherloveblog.com/2012/01/14/do-breastfeeding-moms-get-more-or-less-sleep/
I would love to hear your thoughts on the topic.
Wednesday, November 30, 2011
When things don't go as planned.....
Pregnancy is one of those times when things just cannot be controlled or even predicted. The simple things like whether the baby will be a boy or a girl, where the placenta is attached or even how you carry the baby are not things you can predict.
There are many of us that are planners, we make a plan and expect to be able to follow it.
I have seen many moms who are thrown for a loop by unexpected loops that come to them through pregnancy, and one of the best things you can do for yourself, is prepare for the unexpected!
Ask yourself some questions, what if something that is unexpected happens? How would I like it handled?
Some topics might have to do with the baby's position. What if the baby is breech, posterior, or just an abnormal positioning that causes a long labor? What kind of interventions would you want made in this case?
If your baby was born early, what kind of things would you like in place?
Of course, you do not want to stress over "What if's", but just sort of contemplate them, let someone know, write it down and let it go. I have seen mothers who have had some sudden complications that led them to an early delivery that they had not even thought about, and it is hard (and still, even if you prepared for it, would be hard) to wrap your mind about everything and if you never considered it, is even harder.
Educating yourself on many topics so you know why you want to do something.
Do you want pain medication in labor? If your baby is not positioned the way he should be, your labor may be longer than you might think, would you want to be offered pain medication then? What types do you absolutely not want to take?
If you were going to end up having to have a c-section after a long labor, who would you want to stay with the baby and would you want someone to stay with you while they finish up the surgery?
What types of medication are okay for a breastfeeding baby? It is always advisable to check even on doctors as sometimes they forget too, they are only human!
I know many mothers feel that when things do not go "normal" or according to plan, they can feel that they have somehow failed. This could not be further from the truth! I think this is one reason it is important to have a good support system around you, before, during and after birth to make sure you know that there is always the unexpected in pregnancy and delivery.
It is the normal part of the abnormal!!!
So, prepare for the unexpected, let someone know, even if it is just on a piece of paper, and then relax and enjoy your pregnancy.
There are many of us that are planners, we make a plan and expect to be able to follow it.
I have seen many moms who are thrown for a loop by unexpected loops that come to them through pregnancy, and one of the best things you can do for yourself, is prepare for the unexpected!
Ask yourself some questions, what if something that is unexpected happens? How would I like it handled?
Some topics might have to do with the baby's position. What if the baby is breech, posterior, or just an abnormal positioning that causes a long labor? What kind of interventions would you want made in this case?
If your baby was born early, what kind of things would you like in place?
Of course, you do not want to stress over "What if's", but just sort of contemplate them, let someone know, write it down and let it go. I have seen mothers who have had some sudden complications that led them to an early delivery that they had not even thought about, and it is hard (and still, even if you prepared for it, would be hard) to wrap your mind about everything and if you never considered it, is even harder.
Educating yourself on many topics so you know why you want to do something.
Do you want pain medication in labor? If your baby is not positioned the way he should be, your labor may be longer than you might think, would you want to be offered pain medication then? What types do you absolutely not want to take?
If you were going to end up having to have a c-section after a long labor, who would you want to stay with the baby and would you want someone to stay with you while they finish up the surgery?
What types of medication are okay for a breastfeeding baby? It is always advisable to check even on doctors as sometimes they forget too, they are only human!
I know many mothers feel that when things do not go "normal" or according to plan, they can feel that they have somehow failed. This could not be further from the truth! I think this is one reason it is important to have a good support system around you, before, during and after birth to make sure you know that there is always the unexpected in pregnancy and delivery.
It is the normal part of the abnormal!!!
So, prepare for the unexpected, let someone know, even if it is just on a piece of paper, and then relax and enjoy your pregnancy.
Tuesday, November 15, 2011
Interesting...
Hospital's banning elective c-sections
This article explains how it can be dangerous to just schedule a c-section or induction based on convenience. It explains how many hospitals are banning it, but while I have noticed that many doctors are making women wait a little longer thankfully, I still see a trend to c-sections. I am thankful that the info is getting out there!
This article explains how it can be dangerous to just schedule a c-section or induction based on convenience. It explains how many hospitals are banning it, but while I have noticed that many doctors are making women wait a little longer thankfully, I still see a trend to c-sections. I am thankful that the info is getting out there!
Wednesday, September 14, 2011
Body Image in pregnancy
"Oh, look at that cute belly!!! Can I touch?" The sentence seems like it gets said a lot to pregnant moms. The asking if they can touch, not always as much as they ask as they are touching.
But if you are a mom who feels ungainly and ugly in pregnancy, you are not alone.
Many women struggle, even though in others eyes, they are beautiful and are told so.
They see the love handles that they wished were gone before they had to gain this mandatory weight. They glimpse the cellulite that is on their thighs, with the extra weight gain has become more apparent. The stretch marks on the stomach that you wonder if those models in the pregnant mom shoot covered with makeup....
What are some things we can do to combat this?
I have found that having a plan for a healthy weight gain can help us not only during pregnancy, but afterwards as well.
- Talk to your care provider about a healthy weight gain for you. It varies from person to person, depending on your weight.
- Figure out a calorie goal or the types of foods you should be eating every day as a pregnant mom. I found that aiming for the foods I had to eat was easier than focusing on the things I shouldn't eat. It can be very filling if you make yourself eat 7-9 servings of vegetables, 4-6 servings of fruits, 2 grains, 2-3 servings of protein, 2-4 servings of milk. I suffered from an intolerance of sugar in my pregnancies, it was not gestational diabetes, but just made me very ill. Cutting out sugar though really helped me to gain weight that came off easier.
-I also had one day a week, I could have a treat if I wanted it. That helped because you were not limiting yourself completely.
- Make an exercise plan. This can be anything as simple as a walk everyday....from 5-15 minutes daily at least. Vary your routine, making it one day, you do exercises while cleaning the kitchen. The next day you play ball with your kids, and the next day take a walk.
Spend some money on at least one pretty thing that you feel good in for your pregnancy. It might be a new bra, some wonderful smelling lotion, a pretty shirt or dress. Often we do not spend money on ourselves when we are pregnant as it is such short time, but I think it can really effect our pregnancy, when our mood is down and we do not feel good about ourselves.
But if you are a mom who feels ungainly and ugly in pregnancy, you are not alone.
Many women struggle, even though in others eyes, they are beautiful and are told so.
They see the love handles that they wished were gone before they had to gain this mandatory weight. They glimpse the cellulite that is on their thighs, with the extra weight gain has become more apparent. The stretch marks on the stomach that you wonder if those models in the pregnant mom shoot covered with makeup....
What are some things we can do to combat this?
I have found that having a plan for a healthy weight gain can help us not only during pregnancy, but afterwards as well.
- Talk to your care provider about a healthy weight gain for you. It varies from person to person, depending on your weight.
- Figure out a calorie goal or the types of foods you should be eating every day as a pregnant mom. I found that aiming for the foods I had to eat was easier than focusing on the things I shouldn't eat. It can be very filling if you make yourself eat 7-9 servings of vegetables, 4-6 servings of fruits, 2 grains, 2-3 servings of protein, 2-4 servings of milk. I suffered from an intolerance of sugar in my pregnancies, it was not gestational diabetes, but just made me very ill. Cutting out sugar though really helped me to gain weight that came off easier.
-I also had one day a week, I could have a treat if I wanted it. That helped because you were not limiting yourself completely.
- Make an exercise plan. This can be anything as simple as a walk everyday....from 5-15 minutes daily at least. Vary your routine, making it one day, you do exercises while cleaning the kitchen. The next day you play ball with your kids, and the next day take a walk.
Spend some money on at least one pretty thing that you feel good in for your pregnancy. It might be a new bra, some wonderful smelling lotion, a pretty shirt or dress. Often we do not spend money on ourselves when we are pregnant as it is such short time, but I think it can really effect our pregnancy, when our mood is down and we do not feel good about ourselves.
Thursday, September 1, 2011
Links to interesting posts pertaining to pregnancy
Doula Service
A little bit about me and some pictures
This series of posts on Amy's Finer Things is really good. It is called "Why didn't anyone tell me?"
Postpartum Body
Labor Support
Solid Foods
Elective induction
Bed Rest
Pregnancy after 35
Symptoms of Postpartum Depression
A little bit about me and some pictures
This series of posts on Amy's Finer Things is really good. It is called "Why didn't anyone tell me?"
Postpartum Body
Labor Support
Solid Foods
Elective induction
Bed Rest
Pregnancy after 35
Symptoms of Postpartum Depression
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